My nerd application

Recently I’ve needed to defend my self-identifying with the term nerd. Here’s some of my qualifications: I’ve got 101 pins on my Nerd board on Pinterest. I’m currently re-watching Avatar the Last Airbender. I took a Latin class. For fun. During the summer. I read the book before I see the movie. In the interest of full disclosure I usually do so more than once. I was incredibly saddened not to receive my Hogwarts letter and equally disappointed that Giles didn’t come to my high school and inform me I was a slayer. I believe in midnight releases and obscure references. I think it’s more fun to spell gray with an e. I’m a sapiosexual. I know the word sapiosexual. I keep books in my dresser. I own Harry Potter in four different languages. I’m really tired as I write this because I stayed up til 3 a.m. last night to finish a book. I am a nerd. I’ve never really been in the nerd closet but consider this my formal coming out. Feel free to throw me a party.

I’ve been told that I’m not a nerd because I have friends, or some of the “nerdy” indulgences I like are too mainstream, or I’m a confident girl who doesn’t wear glasses. Fuck that reasoning. Who wants that nerd criteria? According to dictionary.com a nerd is a stupid, irritating, ineffectual, or unattractive person or an intelligent but single-minded person obsessed with anonsocial hobby or pursuit: a computer nerd. Those two definitions contradict each other! Nerd isn’t an intelligence level, it’s a passion. I love how John Green (author and v-logger) describes the concept of a nerd.

To me, this is what nerd means.

That’s the definition of nerd I follow. People who like stuff. The number of other people who also like that stuff remains irrelevant. Nerds possess this rep as emotionless, intellectual, and boring. That’s wrong. It’s lengthy discussion about the air bending gene in Avatar or losing faith in humanity because there’s no second season of Firefly. It’s feelings. It’s fascination. It’s staying up late caught up in a show, movie, or book. It’s using topic specific jargon that fellow nerds of the same subject understand. It’s finding that feeling children have Christmas night and apply it to other aspects of life. Nerds realize the gifts present in life and appreciate them unabashedly.

I want equal rights for nerds. I demand them. It’s time for the dictionary and the public perception to catch up with the times. Rise up and embrace nerdiness in all forms. Go forth and enthuse over the miracle of human consciousness. Upon reflection, we humans have created some pretty amazing things. Appreciate it.

Love stuff already,

Caitlin

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My Feet aren’t that Hairy or a Comprehensive Argument against my being a Hobbit

First of all, The Hobbit starts with “In a hole in the ground there lived in a Hobbit.” My story would start “in a little box on the fourth floor of a dormitory lived a human.” Though some Hobbit homes sound lovely, I have no desire to permanently abide in a hole in the ground. Okay, maybe I’m a progressive hobbit like those in Bree or across the river or even more forward thinking like those Hobbits who settled in Rohan or Gondor. Mere locale cannot prove my lack of Hobbit blood so let’s examine Hobbits’ physical features.

Height is one of the most distinctive Hobbit features. According to the all-knowing Wikipedia, Hobbits are between two and four feet tall. Yes I’m short, but not that short. Just because the whole world has a problem with being freakishly tall doesn’t mean my five foot one height makes me a hobbit. I’m merely a short human in a world full of Ents. I do have a few other Hobbit like traits that deserve acknowledgement. Yes, I would love six meals a day and I despise wearing shoes. Girl shoes are pretty, but not always very comfortable. I could even get down with giving other people presents for my birthday.

My only real issue with being a Hobbit (okay, the hairy feet thing bothers me a tiny bit too) is not coming of age until 33. I’m 20. I did the whole yay I’m sixteen and have my license along with the great I’m eighteen and can buy cigarettes and porn (can being the operative word). Next year I fully intend to celebrate my twenty-first birthday by being free of most age restricting laws (I can’t rent a car in lots of places, but I suck at driving so that’s understandable).

I’m not a Hobbit. I’ll send you pictures of my average looking feet and astound five foot one vertical accomplishment if necessary. I do however adore Hobbits. I even have a Hobbit plushie that I received as a birthday present. We look nothing alike, but we’re great friends nonetheless.

*Also I fully encourage the reading of Tolkien’s The Hobbit before the movie comes out (December 14, 2012).